Why I Started A Blog
1. I have a lot to say and the cats have stopped speaking to me.
2. My Facebook friends asked me to stop posting.
3. I can't say anything succinctly and Twitter has a 140 character limit.
4. I'm trying to lose weight and I can't eat anything while I'm typing.
5. I'm on a quest to expose the truth about single women in their mid-thirties.
6. I moved back in with my parents and they live in a really small town where there are no bars and I am really bored.
Wait. Upon reading my list, I realize I sound somewhat pathetic. But, I'm really not. Honest! And, you can believe that because it is on the internet and everything on the internet is true. But, seriously, let me expound upon the list...
For instance, the cats didn't stop speaking to me. They actually have never spoken to me. They are cats, after all. And, my Facebook friends didn't ask me to stop posting. That is a bold-faced lie that I added in for giggles and to increase the overall count of my list. A few friends have mentioned at times I should write a book about all the somewhat-kooky things that seem to happen to me (usually after another failed dating experiment), but I am editing a book for a freelance client and I know that a book is a lot of work. Blogging sounds less work-ish.
What else? Oh yeah. I am trying to lose weight. That's absolutely true. And, I have not eaten a single thing while I have been writing this entry so it's working. I'm probably even burning calories typing. And, thinking. Now, I could go for a glass of wine, but I'm working on curbing my wino ways, so no vino para me. (Did I just combine Italian and Spanish?)
As for exposing the truth about single women in their mid-thirties, I think the truth will come out eventually. Probably by, like, post number four or something.
Last but oh-most-certainly-NOT least, I live with my parents. Yep. In the basement. And, I'm 34. Yep. It's awesome. Actually, it kind of is - for now. I lived in Denver for almost seven years and moved back to my hometown last year to be closer to family. I decided to move in with my parents to save money for a house. And, it's all working out quite well! Except for the fact that they/we live in a small town and there isn't a whole lot to do around here. Sure, I live in one of the most heavily populated areas of the United States and I could find plenty to do within about 30 minutes of my house... but YOU try to find something fun to do that isn't fattening, over-priced or illegal. Seriously, think. There isn't much left if you add those parameters. So, for now, I am pretty "boring." I work - a lot - and attempt to work out - a little - and well, um, I sleep too. And, apply anti-aging creams.
But the real reason I decided to start this blog is because thoughts run through my brain faster than three year olds at Chuck E Cheese, and I thought it would be therapeutic to spew them out. And, since we've already covered the whole cats not speaking to me thing, obviously the next best thing was to "write" all my crazy-ass,whirling dervish thoughts down and shoot them into cyberspace for all/none/someone to read. Plus, blogs ARE the new black. And, I do try to stay on trend.
So, um, thanks for reading.
Does your mom really read your blog? How are you going to post about naughty things this way? :D
ReplyDeleteIt takes 30 minutes to get anywhere interesting where I live, too, but that's just because traffic is shitty.